2 posts from 2006

One of my favorite moments from Chapelle's Show was the Mad Real World sketch he did in the first season. I've always thought it was a perfect take on how over the years of the Real World, the African-American or African-Americans in the house always seem to get a raw deal and end up being the only people kicked off the show. I loved how Chapelle had a house of mostly African-Americans and one white character, who ends up getting kicked out of the house for his "attitude". My favorite character in that sketch was always Tyree (played by Charlie Murphy), who when he initiates kicking the one white member out of the house, is given the million dollar response that also serves as the title of this entry. 

Well, they say life often imitates art, and in this season of the Real World, "Real World Denver" for those keeping track, there is actually a house mate named Tyree. He's African-American, built very intimidatingly, and loves taking off his shirt whenever he gets in an argument. He's been involved in most of the major scuffles so far this season, and IMHO, none of them have been his fault. He's escalated situations that didn't need any escalation, but he's easily been the most enjoyable cast mate to watch, and I appreciate the fact that he stands up for himself (shirtless or not) as well as the rest of his cast mates, regardless of his opinion of them.

I was watching last night's new episode, and Brooke (the Southern Belle who will obviously end up either having a drinking problem that she solves in one episode, or ends up with some idiot who treats her poorly until she dumps him and hooks up with a cast mate who pretty much does the same) was frustrated after going to get her nails done, and being harassed by a bunch of street types who treated her like she a piece of meat. She comes home, frazzled, and explains how she never should have gone to get her nails done in the *ghetto* and how she was bothered by the locals. Tyree was enjoying a tasty dinner and good conversation with Colie (yah, right!), and asked her to explain what she meant when she said ended up in a ghetto. Brooke assumed Tyree was taking a shot at her, assuming she was saying it was a ghetto because there were lots of African-Americans or whatnot, and ended up getting all emotional and calling a family member telling them "she wants out". (at least the 4th time that's happened in 5 episodes, and one of the main reasons this will go down as one of the all time great seasons)  So as Brooke explodes into tears and walks away (after the mildest of prodding) Tyree turns to Colie and says, "Damn, I don't think I should have to take credit for THAT one" and Colie laughs. I find this show very entertaining, but that was easily one of my favorite all-time moments in the history of Real World.  Tyree asked a simple question, and to be honest, I'd be curious as to what Brooke would call a *ghetto* in Denver, and I WATCHED the damn episode. After her huge reaction, his reaction was perfect and simple. Please keep, keeping it real Tyree, and I'll keep watching.

So I'm flipping around the tube last night, and even though I was making a concerted effort to skip it, I ended up watching "Identity" for about 25 minutes. Identity is a game show hosted by Penn, of Penn & Teller fame (I personally was always more of a Teller fan, mainly for his quiet dignity), where a contestant must *identify* who 12 people are by what their job is/something they done/some odd fact about them. They can only use the people's looks, plus some extremely stupid "help" options, to figure who the people were. Of course, this is the first week of the show, so they give some dude a freaking whole pile of layups, and he wins 500 grand. I'm sure once they bump the prize to a million, they'll make it ridiculously hard by making people choose between "Nobel Prize Winner for Science/Arts" and "Homeless Dude".

So here is my idea, even though this show is only 2 days old: Celebrity Identity! This may sound WAY too easy at first, but you need to think outside the box. Can you imagine someone having to *identify* one more person for a Million Dollar Prize, using the qualifier of "Closeted Gay Actor Who is a Scientology Freak, But Has Actually Slept with His Wife" and having to choose between Tom Cruise and John Travolta? I'd personally pay a Million bucks to see that answer!  Also, the comedy that could ensue, with someone getting hosed on the very 1st *identifier* by choosing "Hasn't Slept with Angelina Jolie" (as a nervous #11 Brad Pitt looks around) and as they look through the 9 male and 3 female contestants going, "I hate to say it, but this is a layup. I'm going with Rob Reiner." With Reiner responding, "Sorry dude, she really wanted Michelle Pfeiffer's part in Story of Us, and even though I nailed her, she still wasn't a good fit for the part. (then raising both arms in the air and yelling "Rob Reiner!") Come on, the ratings would go through the fucking roof. Even Penn's shitting hosting couldn't even kill that show. They could even throw in the curveball of "Slept With Penn's Wife While She Was Still a Stripper", now that answer (and reaction!) would also be worth a million. Bring it on!